E123: She's 18 & Has Life Figured Out (with Hannah)

Show Notes

Hannah was also our guest on Episode 38

Questions for Reflection

In each episode, we offer you a few prompts to think about how that day's conversation applies to you. Our supporters over at Buy Me a Coffee now have exclusive access to the PDF versions of all our Questions for Reflection. Join us today!  
 

1. What would you tell your 18-year-old self? Or, if you are 18, what would you tell your future self?
2. Did you have life figured out when you were 18?
3. Has your life turned out (so far) like you thought it would when you were 18? What has or hasn’t changed?
4. Is there an area of life where your views have changed more than another? Politics? Religion? Finances?

Transcript

Beth Demme (00:03):
Welcome to the Discovering Our Scars Podcast.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (00:05):
Where we share personal experiences so we learn from each other.
 
Beth Demme (00:08):
Our mission is to talk about things you might relate to, but that you don't hear being discussed in other places.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (00:13):
Our hope is that you're encouraged to have honest conversations with people in your own life. I'm Steph.
 
Beth Demme (00:17):
And I'm Beth. On today's show, we're going to have an honest conversation titled, She's 18 and Has Life Figured Out, with Hannah. Hey, Hannah.
 
Hannah Demme (00:26):
Hi.
 
Beth Demme (00:26):
Hannah Demme, my daughter.
 
Hannah Demme (00:29):
Hello.
 
Beth Demme (00:29):
My sweet.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (00:32):
We talked about this a couple weeks ago. Beth and I came up with this idea and then we were like, actually, I think this is a really good idea. You just graduated high school?
 
Hannah Demme (00:41):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (00:41):
Congratulations. Woo-hoo.
 
Hannah Demme (00:43):
Thank you.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (00:44):
And you are going off into college?
 
Hannah Demme (00:47):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (00:47):
And so, you're 18, right?
 
Hannah Demme (00:48):
Yep.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (00:49):
We just thought this would be the perfect time to talk to you because, I know when I was 18, I had life figured out and I knew all the ins and outs of being an adult and adulting, and all those great things. So, we wanted to ask you the things that we, maybe, thought we had figured out and maybe we realize we didn't, or we really did, because I did.
 
Beth Demme (01:12):
Also, you're very much yourself already at 18, and so you do project this sense of that you have it figured out.
 
Hannah Demme (01:22):
I mean, I do feel like I have it figured out.
 
Beth Demme (01:24):
Excellent.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (01:25):
She knows she has it figured out. It's figured out.
 
Beth Demme (01:27):
It's figured.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (01:28):
Pretty much we want to have her again on in four years and we're going to ask her the same questions, and she'll have the identical answers, because she has life figured out now.
 
Hannah Demme (01:36):
Exactly.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (01:37):
See?
 
Beth Demme (01:37):
Yeah.
 
Hannah Demme (01:37):
Exactly.
 
Beth Demme (01:38):
We might talk about this today, but between 18 and 22, I got married.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (01:42):
Oh, wow.
 
Beth Demme (01:44):
Whoa.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (01:44):
See, that's a big life change.
 
Beth Demme (01:45):
That was a big life change.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (01:46):
Did you think at 18 you'd be married at 22?
 
Beth Demme (01:49):
Probably.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (01:50):
Okay.
 
Beth Demme (01:51):
Yeah, probably.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (01:52):
Well, that's a great first question, actually. Are you going to be married by the time we record our next episode?
 
Hannah Demme (01:57):
It really just depends.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (02:00):
Oh-
 
Beth Demme (02:00):
Whoa-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (02:00):
... Depends on what?
 
Beth Demme (02:00):
... that wasn't what I was expecting.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (02:02):
Oh, no, is she engaged right now? Oh, my gosh. This is going on the podcast.
 
Beth Demme (02:07):
I thought you had a different plan. What's your... Okay, fill us in.
 
Hannah Demme (02:12):
Well, I'm already in a relationship that's lasted more than a year.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (02:16):
Woo-hoo.
 
Beth Demme (02:17):
Yes.
 
Hannah Demme (02:18):
If that continues then, I mean, I don't see why not. But again, it just depends on financials and all of that extra stuff. So, I mean, maybe.
 
Beth Demme (02:29):
Okay. Okay.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (02:30):
Okay. So, she may be married. See, that would be a huge change from 18 to 22.
 
Beth Demme (02:35):
That'll be a huge change. Yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (02:35):
So, this relationship has worked for a year.
 
Hannah Demme (02:38):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (02:38):
14 months.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (02:39):
14, 14 months.
 
Beth Demme (02:41):
Yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (02:45):
If this relationship continues, how long do you think until you would want to get married?
 
Hannah Demme (02:50):
I don't really know, but I'm sure there's going to be a point where I'm like, "Okay, get on with it. What are you..."
 
Beth Demme (02:56):
Okay.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (02:56):
Yeah, the next step.
 
Hannah Demme (02:57):
What are you waiting for?
 
Beth Demme (02:58):
Yeah, okay. Okay.
 
Hannah Demme (03:00):
Even if it's not the whole wedding, just a proposal. That's just something different, you know?
 
Beth Demme (03:05):
Okay.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (03:06):
The next step kind of thing.
 
Hannah Demme (03:08):
Yeah, yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (03:09):
Okay. Would you want to get married while you're in college?
 
Hannah Demme (03:11):
I would like to get married probably after my four years.
 
Beth Demme (03:19):
Okay.
 
Hannah Demme (03:19):
And so be engaged-
 
Hannah Demme (03:22):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (03:22):
... in college is fine, but get married, have the ceremony after.
 
Hannah Demme (03:26):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (03:27):
After the four years?
 
Hannah Demme (03:28):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (03:28):
Okay. That's what I did. I graduated college one weekend and got married the next. Yeah, yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (03:32):
Well, there you go. I guess you have a perfect example right here for you.
 
Beth Demme (03:37):
Just do everything the way that I've done it, Hannah. That'll be so great for you. Just kidding.
 
Hannah Demme (03:42):
Gee, thanks. Looking forward to it.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (03:47):
Well, then that's another good question to ask is, what are your views on living with someone before you get married?
 
Beth Demme (03:55):
I am a pastor, there is a right answer to this question.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (03:57):
No, there is not a right answer. She is her own person.
 
Beth Demme (04:00):
She is, she is, a hundred percent.
 
Hannah Demme (04:02):
Okay. I think that there is a yes and no answer.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (04:07):
Okay, perfect.
 
Hannah Demme (04:07):
So I do not think so, if it's a fresh relationship and they're not actually that serious yet. And even if it's just a fling, no.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (04:17):
Okay.
 
Hannah Demme (04:17):
I don't see the point in it. But if it's a serious relationship and has been going on for a while and you actually can see that it will go somewhere, then yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (04:28):
So, do you want to live with your boyfriend before you get married?
 
Hannah Demme (04:35):
Probably when we're engaged.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (04:38):
Okay.
 
Hannah Demme (04:38):
I don't really know how it's going to work out, especially because of college.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (04:41):
Yeah.
 
Hannah Demme (04:42):
So, it really just depends. But I mean, if it was later on in our life and we didn't start dating a year ago then, I mean, yeah. And we didn't have college in the equation, then yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (04:55):
Okay. Do you think that's the majority of your age group thinks that way?
 
Hannah Demme (04:59):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (04:59):
Yeah. I'd agree. I think my age group thinks that way as well.
 
Beth Demme (05:03):
Yeah. Is there an age that it would be too young for someone to get married?
 
Hannah Demme (05:08):
Definitely between 18 and 20.
 
Beth Demme (05:11):
Yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (05:12):
Mm-hmm.
 
Hannah Demme (05:13):
Well, 18, you're just getting out of high school and it's just, it makes me uncomfortable.
 
Beth Demme (05:22):
You got a lot of living to do in these next few years.
 
Hannah Demme (05:26):
If you decide to live with someone right after college or right after high school, you're going into college with all of these different changes, your schedule's different, the school is different. Now your relationship is different, your living experience is different. That's just a lot to get comfortable with at the same time.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (05:46):
Do you believe in divorce?
 
Hannah Demme (05:47):
I do. But I do think that divorce comes with people's mental state. I think it's all from your mind.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (05:57):
All right, so Hannah, we have come up with some just questions that we thought were good things to see your opinions on, but they're a lot. So we thought we would just rapid fire and just boom, boom, boom, get them out there.
 
Hannah Demme (06:10):
All right.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (06:10):
First of all, are you an introvert or extrovert?
 
Hannah Demme (06:14):
I'm definitely an introvert.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (06:16):
Rapid fire, what is your opinion on abortion rights?
 
Hannah Demme (06:20):
I think that it should be okay to do it medically. I don't think people should use it just for fun. But I mean, there's not many posts or people saying that they do.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (06:33):
You turned 18 at a really interesting time politically-
 
Hannah Demme (06:36):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (06:37):
... because when I turned 18, during this span of time, Obama was the president, and so, I personally have always been a Democrat myself. And he was president, and I felt really good about things and was really, didn't pay attention to politics, because I was like, "We're good." But I feel like we're at a different place in time now. So, I'm curious, what are your opinions on, what are your political views and how do you feel about this time in politics?
 
Hannah Demme (07:08):
I think it's crazy. I think it's crazy just because of our past president.
 
Beth Demme (07:17):
Immediate past president or all of them?
 
Hannah Demme (07:19):
Immediate past president.
 
Beth Demme (07:20):
Yeah.
 
Hannah Demme (07:20):
I just find it insane what people think and what they'll actually go through with. And so, I've been reading in the news and everything, and there's lots of conversations to have. And so, both me and my parents, we talk about it a lot for me to, one, understand it more, but also for us to just have the discussion.
 
Beth Demme (07:46):
For us to lament together.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (07:48):
Yeah.
 
Beth Demme (07:48):
Yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (07:49):
Ideally, what do you think the role of the government is to us, the people?
 
Hannah Demme (07:53):
To keep us safe.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (07:55):
Mm-hmm.
 
Hannah Demme (07:55):
But it doesn't seem like they're doing that right now, which is disappointing.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (07:59):
Yeah.
 
Beth Demme (07:59):
Yeah. That's one of the ways that my views have changed since I was 18. Because when I was 18 and could register to vote, there was a Democrat who was the president, but I didn't register Democrat. I registered Republican and was a Republican, truly was a Republican when I registered as Republican and was a Republican for a really long time. Was active in college Republicans and wanted to work on campaigns, got a degree in political science. It was really important to me. And one of my views at 18 was that we need to have limited government, because we can trust corporations to do the right thing. Right?
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (08:33):
That's hilarious.
 
Beth Demme (08:34):
It turns out that was a little bit naïve, because I no longer think that we can trust corporations to do the right thing.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (08:42):
I mean you don't trust Facebook? You don't trust Twitter?
 
Beth Demme (08:46):
Nope.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (08:47):
I mean, you don't trust Google or Amazon?
 
Beth Demme (08:50):
Stephanie, they're listening. They heard me say that.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (08:52):
I know, I'm very sorry. I'm very sorry. We've now been muted on all their platforms where our podcast appears.
 
Beth Demme (08:58):
Right. Yeah, so I still think that less government is good when it comes to things like... I think that government should be there to protect rights, not to limit rights.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (09:13):
Like protecting your right to make choices about your body.
 
Beth Demme (09:16):
Right. So, not being forced to have a baby? I think that's where government involvement makes sense. So then I get confused when people say things like, "Well, the government can tell a woman she has to have a baby, but the government can't tell me I have to wear a mask." That confuses me, but-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (09:33):
Which is probably why you're not registered Republican anymore.
 
Beth Demme (09:36):
Yeah, but I'm not registered as a Democrat either, because that doesn't feel right to me still. So I am no party affiliation. But you registered to vote this week.
 
Hannah Demme (09:45):
Yes, as a Democrat.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (09:49):
Woo-hoo. Two Democrats.
 
Hannah Demme (09:50):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (09:50):
Woot, woot.
 
Hannah Demme (09:51):
They pointed this out the other day, I'm the first Democrat in the family. I have noticed that a lot of teenagers around my age or even juniors, seniors in high school, they just see what everyone else is doing and then just do it. So I actually know someone and they like the sound of being a Republican, but they do not agree with what they say about the abortion rights.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (10:19):
What does that mean they like the sound of being a...
 
Hannah Demme (10:20):
They just want to be a Republican just for them to be a Republican. I was like, there's a lot of Republicans in the state of Florida.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (10:27):
Yes. Oh, well, yeah.
 
Hannah Demme (10:27):
So they want to be like everyone else, even though they don't have the same opinions.
 
Beth Demme (10:31):
And because we live in a blue dot, I think for some folks it's almost like an act of rebellion. And most of them have parents who are also Republican and I think that their parents see it the same way, too, "I'm a Republican in a blue dot. I'm standing up for America," whatever. And so I think that it feeds into that persona in a way that's amusing.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (10:53):
Yep.
 
Beth Demme (10:54):
Okay, so I totally got us off on the rapid-fire thing. So, we're on politics-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (10:59):
Oh, no, I was like rapid fire, "Well, in my-"
 
Beth Demme (11:02):
Two questions in. Okay, so do you think that people should be allowed to have guns?
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (11:08):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (11:09):
Do you think that people should be allowed to have automatic weapons with unlimited amounts of ammunition?
 
Hannah Demme (11:15):
Yes, but with some protected paper that they sign to make sure that they're actually sane and that they won't murder an entire school or anything like that. I do think that it's okay to have one to carry, because I understand the feeling of, I understand going out and wanting something on me, for me to feel somewhat protected, even if I'm in a fun environment. But I do see that. And then also, people just use it also for hunting and everything. But I know pistols, they don't use for hunting, but I mean, I don't see why not. I don't want anyone to die. That's the one thing. I think they should have something to protect that more.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (12:00):
Are you feminist?
 
Hannah Demme (12:03):
Yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (12:03):
What does that mean to you?
 
Hannah Demme (12:05):
It means that men and women should be equal in everything.
 
Beth Demme (12:10):
So do you think that if a woman and man, if there's a woman and a man and they're both doing the same job with the same qualifications, do you think they should be paid the same?
 
Hannah Demme (12:18):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (12:18):
Radical.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (12:19):
Yeah. That's what-
 
Beth Demme (12:20):
Radical feminist.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (12:20):
That's a feminist right there.
 
Hannah Demme (12:22):
I mean, they're both people. Okay, if they both had short hair and they're doing the same thing, they should get paid the exact same. Because they're doing the same thing. I don't know why the gender actually has to define how much they're getting paid, because that just doesn't make sense.
 
Beth Demme (12:40):
The gender is as meaningless as the length of their hair.
 
Hannah Demme (12:42):
Exactly. Yes, mm-hmm.
 
Beth Demme (12:44):
Interesting. Do you think, Hannah, that marriage is only between one man and one woman?
 
Hannah Demme (12:49):
No.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (12:50):
So you think two women and one man?
 
Hannah Demme (12:53):
Sure.
 
Beth Demme (12:53):
Whoa.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (12:54):
Yes.
 
Hannah Demme (12:57):
Sure.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (12:58):
So you believe in polygamy?
 
Hannah Demme (12:59):
Yeah.
 
Beth Demme (13:01):
Why?
 
Hannah Demme (13:03):
Because the world is weird, but everyone loves in different ways. So I don't see why I wouldn't say-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (13:11):
How about one woman and four men? I mean, can a woman have four husbands?
 
Hannah Demme (13:18):
I mean, a long, long time ago, guys could have four women.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (13:24):
That's what I'm saying. So you agree with both directions?
 
Hannah Demme (13:27):
Yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (13:27):
A woman can have multiple husbands and a man can have multiple wives.
 
Hannah Demme (13:31):
Right. If it is actually consensual and is an actual act of love. I don't see why not.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (13:40):
Okay.
 
Hannah Demme (13:41):
I know people won't understand it. Because I know that, in our past, it was frowned upon, because why would a guy have so many wives? Usually just because of his pleasure. But I don't really think that's what everything is now.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (13:57):
Okay. So, I guess on that sense, you believe in gay marriage?
 
Hannah Demme (14:03):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (14:04):
And if that was to go away, federally, would you be very upset about that?
 
Hannah Demme (14:11):
I would be upset for the people who aren't able to get married because of it, yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (14:15):
Or, their marriage becomes null and void-
 
Hannah Demme (14:18):
Exactly.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (14:18):
... because of it.
 
Hannah Demme (14:20):
And I know that this has, they were able to do it, they weren't able to do it. They were able to do it, they weren't able to do it. So it's just very complicated for them. And I don't know... It hurts me to see that they aren't able to keep a marriage just like straight people.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (14:37):
Yeah.
 
Beth Demme (14:37):
So far it's still federally protected, but we'll see what the Supreme Court does with it. But so far, it's still...
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (14:42):
Well, when I was born, there was other rights that we had and we don't want anymore.
 
Beth Demme (14:46):
Yeah, it's true. It's true. I am flabbergasted, Hannah, by the idea that multiple people in a marriage is okay. It never occurred to me to even ask you that question.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (14:57):
We're going to ask her again in four years. Don't worry about it.
 
Beth Demme (14:59):
I know, I know. But I got to sit with it for a second. I got to think about it.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (15:02):
No, that's the rapid fire. It's rapid fire.
 
Hannah Demme (15:04):
It is very odd, I will say. But-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (15:06):
It's her opinion. That's what we want.
 
Hannah Demme (15:07):
If it's love, it's love.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (15:09):
That's her opinion. She's 18, she knows it all, Beth.
 
Beth Demme (15:14):
Okay.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (15:14):
She knows it all.
 
Beth Demme (15:16):
I mean...
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (15:16):
She knows it all. It's okay. That's her... Rapid fire.
 
Beth Demme (15:21):
Yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (15:22):
I think you might miss the definition of [inaudible 00:15:23]-
 
Beth Demme (15:23):
I just want to explore-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (15:25):
Wait, I'm going to sit on that rapid fire there.
 
Beth Demme (15:28):
But they have to all be adults and it has to be something that they all want.
 
Hannah Demme (15:32):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (15:32):
Is that what you're saying?
 
Hannah Demme (15:33):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (15:33):
Okay.
 
Hannah Demme (15:34):
I know people have been able to do it... I've seen people, online videos of people doing it, and it's all very consensual and they all want to do it. And I've seen it with three people, I've seen it with four people.
 
Beth Demme (15:48):
Have you ever seen it, though, where it's a woman with more than one husband? Because I always see it where it's a man with sister wives. I've never seen a woman with brother husbands.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (15:59):
I've never a wife with multiple husbands.
 
Beth Demme (16:01):
Which I think says something about what it is.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (16:04):
Yeah.
 
Beth Demme (16:04):
About what it is and about the economics of the arrangement and about the economics in our society also.
 
Hannah Demme (16:10):
I haven't seen a woman with three husbands or a guy with three wives or anything. But I have seen, the four people in a relationship, it started off just two couples and they were friends, and then they all loved each other in that same way, and so, it was-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (16:30):
Two couples.
 
Beth Demme (16:30):
So two men and two women.
 
Hannah Demme (16:31):
Two men and two women. So one man has two wives, the other man has two wives. They both have two husbands.
 
Beth Demme (16:37):
Okay. Do the men have husbands also?
 
Hannah Demme (16:40):
Yeah.
 
Beth Demme (16:41):
Wow. You need to show me that video.
 
Hannah Demme (16:43):
I don't know if I can find it, but I will try.
 
Beth Demme (16:45):
I'm so curious. I'm just so curious. Okay, back to rapid fire.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (16:49):
So Hannah, once you're graduated from college-
 
Hannah Demme (16:54):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (16:55):
... what job do you want to have?
 
Hannah Demme (16:57):
Well, the job that I want to end up with, I will not have at the end of four years. I will need a PhD, because I would like to be a psychologist.
 
Beth Demme (17:07):
What, you told me the other day you-
 
Hannah Demme (17:08):
Professor.
 
Beth Demme (17:08):
Yeah, professor.
 
Hannah Demme (17:09):
Yes, a professor.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (17:09):
You want to teach psychology?
 
Hannah Demme (17:10):
I would love to teach psychology in a college.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (17:12):
Oh, okay. Okay, so your ultimate goal is to teach psychology?
 
Hannah Demme (17:16):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (17:17):
In a college-
 
Hannah Demme (17:17):
I would love that.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (17:17):
... in a four-year university. Awesome.
 
Hannah Demme (17:19):
For a while I thought I was going to be a therapist-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (17:22):
Yeah, that's what I thought.
 
Hannah Demme (17:22):
... for people who had trauma and addiction. And I would love to help people like that, but I don't know if mentally I would be able to handle that. So, I was like, well let me teach people to help them, so then I don't have to-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (17:43):
Very cool.
 
Hannah Demme (17:43):
... in the most sincere way possible.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (17:46):
Yeah, very cool. So what salary do you think you'll have at that job?
 
Hannah Demme (17:51):
I don't know the specific number, but-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (17:53):
What would you like it to be?
 
Hannah Demme (17:54):
I would like it to be enough for me to be able to support myself.
 
Beth Demme (17:58):
How much do you think that is?
 
Hannah Demme (17:59):
I don't know. Give me a number.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (18:01):
Just give me a number of how much money you'd like to make a year.
 
Hannah Demme (18:03):
85,000?
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (18:04):
85,000. Okay.
 
Beth Demme (18:06):
Good number.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (18:08):
How many kids do you want to have, if any?
 
Hannah Demme (18:11):
Two or three.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (18:12):
What's your timeline for that?
 
Hannah Demme (18:13):
So, I actually have this all planned out.
 
Beth Demme (18:16):
Oh, okay, okay.
 
Hannah Demme (18:18):
If it's two, three, maybe. I don't know. So I would like to have two to start with at. I don't want to have one kid. So I'll get married, have five years with my husband, and then we're going to start trying and we'll have one kid and then another kid close to age, so quite quickly. And then the third one, I wasn't really thinking of me getting pregnant with that one. I was thinking if we thought we could foster or if we saw something or if we wanted to adopt. I think that that's where the third person would come in, but not three pregnancies.
 
Beth Demme (18:57):
Okay.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (18:57):
And what if you can't get pregnant?
 
Hannah Demme (19:00):
If I can't get pregnant? Then adoption.
 
Beth Demme (19:03):
Cool.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (19:03):
Do you want any pets?
 
Hannah Demme (19:05):
I do.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (19:05):
What do you want?
 
Hannah Demme (19:06):
I want dogs.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (19:07):
Yes.
 
Hannah Demme (19:08):
My dad always says that he's allergic, but I never believed him.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (19:13):
That's always the line, "I'm allergic."
 
Hannah Demme (19:15):
Yep. I would love to have one dog whenever I'm first married. And then I want another dog as a puppy, just born puppy, to come along with my first kid.
 
Beth Demme (19:27):
Aww, that's a lot of work.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (19:28):
Cute.
 
Hannah Demme (19:29):
I would love that. They would grow up together.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (19:31):
That would be so cute. They would grow up together.
 
Hannah Demme (19:34):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (19:34):
I do want to say in defense of your dad, he is 100% allergic to cats.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (19:40):
To cat.
 
Hannah Demme (19:40):
Yeah, there you go. There it is.
 
Beth Demme (19:42):
Yes. What do you expect to get out of college?
 
Hannah Demme (19:45):
Well, education.
 
Beth Demme (19:48):
Good.
 
Hannah Demme (19:49):
Learning experience? Not just with education, but with life, in general. I think college is a great way for you to understand what to do whenever you move out, when you're on your own financially, and then definitely friends who I would bond with.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (20:11):
So explain the Wesley Foundation and what you're going to be doing.
 
Hannah Demme (20:15):
Yeah. It's the Wesley Foundation for TCC to FSU. The easiest way for me to put it, it's like a youth group for college students. So there's lots of things that we can make so that we can share the word. So Bible study, Wednesday night dinners, Sunday morning services and just hangout time. And we can really come up with whatever we want because one of my ideas was a movie night. That would be so much fun. But we can do that easily. Just-
 
Beth Demme (20:55):
Yeah.
 
Hannah Demme (20:56):
... put something on, and-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (20:57):
So you'll be on staff-
 
Hannah Demme (20:59):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (20:59):
... and living at the Wesley Foundation.
 
Hannah Demme (21:01):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (21:01):
And so your job will be to find ways to get more college students to come and participate in the events.
 
Hannah Demme (21:09):
Yes. And also, I do have the opportunity to be one of the leaders for one of those events. So there's that. But also, for being on staff, you have to take care of the building. So I mean, that's what our little chores are really to do, but it's really just hang out, get people to come.
 
Beth Demme (21:32):
It's a ginormous building, so I worry a little bit that the idea of the chores related to maintaining the building have been undersold, because it's a really large facility.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (21:42):
How many people, how many students are there that-
 
Hannah Demme (21:44):
That are on staff?
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (21:45):
Yeah.
 
Hannah Demme (21:46):
There is 10 of us.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (21:48):
Okay, so 10 of you manage the building.
 
Hannah Demme (21:50):
Mm-hmm.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (21:50):
Okay.
 
Beth Demme (21:51):
And there are three full-time, non-residential staff people also. Okay.
 
Hannah Demme (21:57):
Mm-hmm.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (21:58):
And so, you guys all live there. And so you're not living in an apartment or dorm room. It's part of your job?
 
Hannah Demme (22:06):
Right.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (22:06):
Yeah.
 
Beth Demme (22:06):
Okay.
 
Hannah Demme (22:07):
They do have three apartments in one building and has different amount of bedrooms in it. And since I'm a freshman, I do have to share a room with someone. So it's like a dorm room experience.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (22:23):
So, you mentioned you're going to be working at the Wesley Foundation, which is a Methodist foundation.
 
Beth Demme (22:31):
Yep. Campus ministry.
 
Hannah Demme (22:32):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (22:32):
Campus ministry. And so, obviously, Beth is your mom and she's a pastor-
 
Hannah Demme (22:39):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (22:39):
Lucky you.
 
Hannah Demme (22:40):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (22:41):
So lucky.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (22:41):
Although she hasn't been a pastor your whole life.
 
Hannah Demme (22:43):
Right. [inaudible 00:22:44]
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (22:44):
Yeah, that's true. This is new. So, do you think church is important and what are your views on church? God, that whole thing?
 
Hannah Demme (22:52):
So, me and my mom have a lot of the same opinions about the Bible. Church though, she loves going to church every Sunday.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (23:02):
Mm-hmm.
 
Beth Demme (23:02):
I do. I do.
 
Hannah Demme (23:04):
And she likes-
 
Beth Demme (23:05):
Don't make me sound like a freak. I love going to church. I do. I go there almost every day. Yeah.
 
Hannah Demme (23:10):
Well also, it's your job.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (23:12):
It's your job.
 
Beth Demme (23:12):
Oh yeah, that, too. That, too.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (23:13):
It's your job.
 
Hannah Demme (23:15):
And she likes a different kind of church than I do. She likes the older people that are so loving, so great.
 
Beth Demme (23:23):
They're awesome.
 
Hannah Demme (23:24):
I agree, but I like a little bit more of a young life surrounding. Which is great because of Wesley, but I don't think that everyone needs to go every single Sunday. For me, I don't go. I haven't gone in a while.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (23:43):
How do you feel about that, that you haven't gone to church?
 
Hannah Demme (23:45):
I'm fine with it, because I am doing things with Wesley, like Bible study and going to dinner with them. So I'm still getting that. And I'm able to be at home and study the Bible myself. So I'm not avoiding it and I'm not purposely not going.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (24:05):
Do you identify as a Christian?
 
Hannah Demme (24:06):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (24:07):
Do you think you have to go to a physical church to be a Christian?
 
Hannah Demme (24:11):
No.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (24:12):
Do you think your job is going to make you a stronger Christian?
 
Hannah Demme (24:15):
100%. That's why I'm so excited about it. Because beginning of senior year, somewhere like the second nine weeks, something like that, I was constantly in my Bible, doing Bible study with one of my friends and it was great. And then senior year happened and it's just crazy. So I actually haven't been able to do that in a while and I can see Wesley encouraging me to do that and getting more into it, which I am so excited for.
 
Hannah Demme (24:46):
But back to your question, I do think that it is important for people to go, if they are not connecting themselves with God. So, if they're going through a hard time and they're blaming God for everything, I think that they should go. Because I do think that that's where God shows up the most. But I know that he's always with us, but like, again, that's where you can reach out to him the easiest.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (25:14):
Do you think members of the LGBTQ+ community should be pastors in the Methodist church?
 
Hannah Demme (25:19):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (25:21):
Do you think women should be pastors?
 
Hannah Demme (25:22):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (25:23):
Do you think that Methodist pastors should marry LGBTQ+ members?
 
Hannah Demme (25:30):
Yeah. Something that I've always said is, well, not always said, but I've just thought of that I would love to always say, is love is love is love. Just like sin is sin is sin, but love is love is love.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (25:42):
What is sin to you?
 
Hannah Demme (25:44):
Sin is where you do something... It's a very complicated question. Because disrespecting God, I think of as a sin. So anything that is disrespecting God. But I also believe that God loves everyone for who they are. And so, if who they are is gay, lesbian, transgender, then I don't see why that's such a sin. I don't know why that is a sin to people.
 
Beth Demme (26:15):
Right. How can it be a sin to be the person God created you to be?
 
Hannah Demme (26:18):
Exactly.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (26:19):
Do you think it's a sin to break the law?
 
Hannah Demme (26:21):
I don't think that the law is in the Bible. So I do not think that is. But I do think murder is. Everyone else would agree with me, and that is part of the law. But the laws are surrounded around our safety. At least they were.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (26:38):
Do you think that breaking a Ten Commandment is a sin?
 
Hannah Demme (26:42):
No. I think that the Ten Commandments is a guide for us to be closer to God, but it's not rules.
 
Beth Demme (26:51):
I would say that, too. I would say the Ten Commandments are 10 covenant principles that God offers us for how to live in relationship with God and with each other.
 
Hannah Demme (26:57):
Yeah.
 
Beth Demme (26:58):
Do you think mental health is important? I know you that you want to study psychology, but like...
 
Hannah Demme (27:02):
Absolutely.
 
Beth Demme (27:03):
So do you have a plan for staying mentally healthy-
 
Hannah Demme (27:06):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (27:06):
... while you're in college?
 
Hannah Demme (27:07):
Yes. Well, God is definitely one of them. And also, having a schedule for me to be able to see my mental health through it. I have set up my first semester in college so that I have one big thing each day. Because I know if I take on more than that, it's going to be overwhelming and my mental health is going to go bad. And so, just being able to schedule things out, with keeping my mental health in mind.
 
Beth Demme (27:37):
What about your physical health? Do you have a plan to stay physically healthy in college?
 
Hannah Demme (27:40):
I do not, but I would love to, but I don't know if I have enough time for it. I don't know how busy I'm going to be. But whenever I figure that out, then I probably will be able to.
 
Beth Demme (27:51):
You made me think of Steph the other day. We were at home and her brother happened to be over, and she brought out this thing in her planner and she was like, "I need you to help me meal plan." She's telling her brother this because he's in culinary school. And she's like, "These are the foods that I think it's okay to eat, but how do I put them together and fill this out as a meal plan?" And he's like, "Yeah, I'll help you." I was like, "Aww, Steph did that with her meals." Yeah.
 
Hannah Demme (28:14):
Yeah. I'm designing his tattoo. And he's like, "I'll even pay you for you to do it." And I'm like, "I have another idea, that I know that you will like doing. We'll do trade."
 
Beth Demme (28:25):
That's smart. Yeah, for sure.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (28:27):
What are your financial goals while in college? And do you have a retirement plan?
 
Hannah Demme (28:31):
I do not have a retirement plan, but I do want to be able to have the money for me to live, for food shelter and just stuff like that. I know that I am blessed to have parents who are helping me through it financially, but whenever that doesn't go on anymore, my goal is to have enough money for me to do all the things that I was able to do with them helping me.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (29:00):
So will they be paying for things while you're in college, or will you be paying for things?
 
Hannah Demme (29:05):
They will be paying for things.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (29:06):
And then all the money you make will be in, will go to your savings?
 
Hannah Demme (29:11):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (29:12):
What state or country do you plan to live in after college? Do you think you'll be in the United States?
 
Hannah Demme (29:17):
Oh, yeah.
 
Beth Demme (29:17):
What state?
 
Hannah Demme (29:19):
Georgia?
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (29:20):
Oh, why?
 
Hannah Demme (29:21):
Because I'm able to reach all of the seasons.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (29:24):
Oh. But be close enough to Florida?
 
Hannah Demme (29:27):
That'd be close. Yeah, yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (29:29):
Where does your current boyfriend want to live?
 
Hannah Demme (29:33):
Georgia.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (29:34):
Okay. Now, we're seeing...
 
Beth Demme (29:37):
See the connection here?
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (29:39):
I see it. Is he from Georgia?
 
Hannah Demme (29:41):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (29:41):
Oh, okay.
 
Hannah Demme (29:42):
He was actually born in Athens and so was his dad. And his parents actually met in Georgia.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (29:48):
Oh, okay. Athens very similar to Tallahassee.
 
Hannah Demme (29:51):
Yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (29:51):
Yeah. I have a friend that's from Athens.
 
Hannah Demme (29:53):
Athens, you're able to at least see snow. Here you cannot.
 
Beth Demme (29:59):
Yes, I agree.
 
Hannah Demme (29:59):
I would like to see it from a distance. I don't want to deal with it. I want to see it from a distance and still feel cold, with the wind and see the leaves falling. I want to see all the seasons. Here in Tallahassee, it is either somewhat cold or very hot. There's never any in between.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (30:18):
How many tattoos do you currently have?
 
Hannah Demme (30:19):
I have one.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (30:19):
You have one tattoo. You got that when you were...
 
Hannah Demme (30:22):
18.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (30:23):
18. And when your mom was out of town.
 
Beth Demme (30:26):
Out of town.
 
Hannah Demme (30:26):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (30:26):
So, in in four years how many-
 
Hannah Demme (30:28):
I also... This isn't going to help the situation, but I also got a piercing when she was gone, a day before I got the tattoo.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (30:37):
Yes. Piercing [inaudible 00:30:38]
 
Beth Demme (30:38):
It was very eventful time. First time ever, we were like, "Hey, we're going to go to town for a few days, Hannah. Have fun."
 
Hannah Demme (30:43):
All they said was no one can come over.
 
Beth Demme (30:46):
Except for one person. Except for your-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (30:48):
Except for my friend.
 
Beth Demme (30:49):
Yeah.
 
Hannah Demme (30:49):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (30:49):
Perfect.
 
Hannah Demme (30:49):
Yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (30:50):
And she didn't say you can't go out and get a tattoo-
 
Hannah Demme (30:52):
Right, no.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (30:52):
... and piercing.
 
Beth Demme (30:53):
No, she followed-
 
Hannah Demme (30:53):
And I did warn you beforehand.
 
Beth Demme (30:55):
No, you did. You communicated with me. I have no complaints about it.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (30:58):
I love how she said warning. Not I ran it past you, I warned you.
 
Beth Demme (31:01):
Right.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (31:02):
It's happening.
 
Beth Demme (31:03):
I was informed that this is going to happen-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (31:05):
FYI.
 
Beth Demme (31:05):
... I was not consulted. [inaudible 00:31:07]
 
Hannah Demme (31:07):
I texted her, "I'm getting a piercing by the way." And then the next day, "I'm getting a tattoo by the way."
 
Beth Demme (31:13):
Yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (31:13):
I love it.
 
Beth Demme (31:14):
My only feedback on it was that there was one place I didn't think she should get pierced and she didn't. And she-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (31:21):
The nose, right?
 
Beth Demme (31:22):
Yeah. I just think they're gross.
 
Hannah Demme (31:23):
The nose and the belly button. I'm not going to.
 
Beth Demme (31:25):
I'm almost afraid to ask this.
 
Hannah Demme (31:27):
Okay.
 
Beth Demme (31:28):
And how many tattoos do you think you'll have in four years?
 
Hannah Demme (31:31):
In four years, I think at the most three.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (31:33):
Okay.
 
Hannah Demme (31:34):
I would like to get, "God is greater than all the highs and lows." And I would like to get the coordinates of where my brother and I were born.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (31:41):
Oh, cool. Were you born in the same place?
 
Hannah Demme (31:43):
No.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (31:44):
Okay.
 
Hannah Demme (31:44):
So I was more north and he was more south.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (31:46):
Oh, okay.
 
Beth Demme (31:47):
So Steph, I'm curious. What would you tell your 18-year-old old self? You have this, the benefit of all this additional life experience since you were 18. If 18-year-old Steph was sitting in the hot seat where Hannah's sitting today, what would you say to her?
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (32:06):
The older I've gotten, the older I realize you can't tell anyone anything. I couldn't even tell myself something. If I told myself, I wouldn't have listened. If I was to tell you, you wouldn't listen. You got to live out life. So I think I would tell myself, you don't have it figured out and that's okay, and you still have a lot of learning and a lot of living, and don't be afraid of that.
 
Beth Demme (32:33):
Oh, that's good advice. Don't be afraid.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (32:35):
Yeah.
 
Beth Demme (32:35):
That's good.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (32:37):
And it's okay not to have it figured out. The older I get, the more I think I don't have anything figured out, and I think that's okay. Every day I live and I learn something, and it may cancel out something I learned in the past and that's okay. It's okay to keep living and learning. And if something I used to do is wrong or no longer works, that's okay. That doesn't mean I'm a bad person or that I was doing it wrong for so long, that's okay. What would you tell your 18-year-old self, Beth?
 
Beth Demme (33:08):
Actually, I think that what you just said is really important, that it's to give yourself permission to change. Because I do think that I had a long period of time where I thought, "Well, if I change, then I'm saying I was wrong. And if I was wrong, then I was bad." In hindsight, I wish I hadn't been held back by that kind of thinking. But the main thing that I think I would want to tell my 18-year-old self is that it's going to be okay. I just had a lot of uncertainty and a lot of anxiety. I even remember telling someone, before Steven and I got married, a random person. We were... You guys, I was at the gym, believe it or not.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (33:50):
What?
 
Beth Demme (33:50):
I know.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (33:51):
Beth at the gym.
 
Beth Demme (33:51):
I went very randomly-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (33:53):
Was it accidental?
 
Beth Demme (33:54):
... in college. And I was trying to do a step aerobics class, which was a stupid idea. It was just a stupid idea. I got hurt. It was a whole thing. Anyway, I was waiting for that class to start, and I was engaged, and got in a conversation with a girl sitting next to me, who was also waiting for class to start. And she was saying that her boyfriend had just proposed to her and that she said yes and she wanted to say yes, and now she was not sure. And I was like, "Well, I think that the guys have an advantage, because they're sure when they ask."
 
Beth Demme (34:25):
But I remember having a conversation with her about, I don't know if this is a word, but I remember calling it, sticktuitiveness. What if I am committing to this marriage but I don't actually have the sticktuitiveness that it takes? And I do, and I have. And so, I would just tell my 18-year-old self, "It's going to be okay." Hannah, what would you want to tell your future self, do you think? When you're listening back to this, in four years, in preparation for answering these questions again, what do you imagine you might want to hear?
 
Hannah Demme (35:03):
So that's difficult because I don't actually know what's going to be going on. So I can't give advice, which I'm usually good at. But I know me and I know that mental health is very important, and sometimes I can get lost in it or even forget about it. So I would probably be like, put yourself first and it's okay to do that.
 
Beth Demme (35:27):
All right. What if you went back four years, what would you say to ninth grade Hannah to the Hannah just starting high school instead of college? What would you say?
 
Hannah Demme (35:37):
Yeah, I would definitely say, so ninth grade was a really crazy time for me. I would say, "Everything's okay."
 
Beth Demme (35:45):
It's probably the hardest year of your life.
 
Hannah Demme (35:47):
That was a really tough year.
 
Beth Demme (35:48):
Yeah.
 
Hannah Demme (35:49):
Yeah. "Everything's going to be okay. In four years, you're going to look back and you're going to grow from it."
 
Beth Demme (35:55):
Do you know what I would tell ninth grade Hannah?
 
Hannah Demme (35:57):
What?
 
Beth Demme (35:58):
"Don't date that boy."
 
Hannah Demme (35:59):
Yeah. I would say the same thing.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (36:01):
Uh oh.
 
Hannah Demme (36:02):
Yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (36:03):
There's a story there?
 
Beth Demme (36:03):
It was a boy in ninth grade. Not a good choice.
 
Hannah Demme (36:05):
Nope.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (36:05):
That was part of the problem?
 
Beth Demme (36:05):
But you know what? Sometimes you just, you got to not make a good choice. Sometimes you just got to do it.
 
Hannah Demme (36:13):
Yep.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (36:14):
That's how you learn to make the good choices.
 
Hannah Demme (36:15):
11th grade Hannah, though, she had a better taste in guys.
 
Beth Demme (36:20):
You grew up a lot between ninth grade and 11th grade, that's for sure.
 
Hannah Demme (36:22):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (36:27):
Well, thank you, Hannah. It was great to have you on for the second time, and it will be great to have you on for the third time in four years. Now, if we're not doing this podcast in four years, we're going to still get this stuff out, get the dust off of it, and we are going to record this episode. I'm committed to it.
 
Beth Demme (36:44):
And release it some way, somehow.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (36:46):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (36:46):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (36:47):
I am committed to it. Are you committed to it?
 
Beth Demme (36:48):
I'm committed. At one point you said to me, we'll have Hannah on in four years and that'll be our concluding episode.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (36:56):
When did I say that?
 
Beth Demme (36:57):
You did say that.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (36:58):
Really?
 
Beth Demme (36:58):
Yeah. And I was like, "Oh, okay. That's sounds so ominous."
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (37:02):
We'll be done in four years? Wow, you'll be our last guest ever, apparently.
 
Hannah Demme (37:06):
Well, I'm honored.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (37:08):
Are you committed in four years? Will you still...
 
Hannah Demme (37:10):
Yeah.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (37:11):
You'll come on?
 
Hannah Demme (37:11):
Yeah. I'm excited to see what, how my answers changed.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (37:16):
Your mom is very, all she's thinking about is your polygamy answer. And-
 
Beth Demme (37:20):
I can't think about anything else. You're right. Oh, why?
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (37:23):
All she's thinking about is that you are going to be married to five men in four years.
 
Beth Demme (37:31):
I mean, I've just had the one husband for these 26 years.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (37:35):
That's old school, Beth. New school, you get multiple husbands.
 
Beth Demme (37:39):
Is that how long I've been married? Yeah, 26 years. Yeah. And I just got to say one is more than enough trouble.
 
Hannah Demme (37:46):
Oh, I believe it. I'm not saying I would want that.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (37:48):
She wasn't saying she's going to do it, but we'll see. We don't know. Four years? We don't know.
 
Beth Demme (37:52):
I mean, do you have any friends that are dating more than one person?
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (37:56):
No.
 
Beth Demme (37:57):
There's a reason for that. Right?
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (37:59):
I think it's pretty traditional-
 
Hannah Demme (38:01):
I'm sure-
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (38:01):
... one and one.
 
Hannah Demme (38:02):
I am sure it's a lot of work. I don't even understand cheating. That's a lot of work, too. Guys, they have to deal with their girlfriend, while lying to them, which is also difficult. And they have to sneak around, tell this girl that they want to do whatever they want. It's too much work to cheat.
 
Beth Demme (38:27):
It's just too much work.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (38:27):
Why would you cheat?
 
Hannah Demme (38:27):
So much.
 
Beth Demme (38:27):
Too much work.
 
Hannah Demme (38:27):
Exactly.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (38:30):
I mean, that's a good campaign. Why cheat? It's too much work.
 
Hannah Demme (38:33):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (38:33):
And also it hurts people.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (38:35):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (38:35):
And also...
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (38:36):
Well, yeah, yeah, yeah. And you're also a horrible person if you cheat. I mean, there's a lot of things, but just, it's too much work.
 
Hannah Demme (38:43):
It's a lot of work.
 
Beth Demme (38:44):
So we always ask our guests the same question. So we've asked you this question before, I think, but we're going to ask you again. What book, TV show or podcast are you excited about right now?
 
Hannah Demme (38:56):
I am reading Colleen Hoover. And she has this series and it's the, she has a, Maybe Someday, a Maybe Never, and then her new book, which is Maybe Now, and I'm excited for that.
 
Beth Demme (39:12):
Excited for that one to... Has it come out yet?
 
Hannah Demme (39:14):
I actually don't know. I've heard people-
 
Beth Demme (39:16):
Because you're reading another... Are you still reading, you're reading some other stuff by her, too, right?
 
Hannah Demme (39:19):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (39:19):
Because you gave me a stack.
 
Hannah Demme (39:21):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (39:23):
I read two. I'm making my way through the stack.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (39:25):
Are they the physical books?
 
Hannah Demme (39:26):
Uh-huh.
 
Beth Demme (39:27):
Isn't that weird?
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (39:28):
I love physical books.
 
Hannah Demme (39:29):
I love it.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (39:29):
Yeah. It's old school.
 
Beth Demme (39:31):
It is old school.
 
Hannah Demme (39:31):
I'm so old school-
 
Beth Demme (39:32):
So I'm old school wanting to have just the one husband, but I will do a Kindle book. I'll do a digital-
 
Hannah Demme (39:37):
I'm old school if anything comes to paper.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (39:41):
Don't you like records, too?
 
Hannah Demme (39:42):
Yes.
 
Beth Demme (39:42):
Yes.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (39:43):
See, she's so old school. She's old school.
 
Hannah Demme (39:45):
I like planners. I like printing things out for me to then write on them. I like taking notes by hand.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (39:51):
See, me, too. I don't know. That might be a dyslexic thing, because I need the, I like the physical, and to physically write.
 
Hannah Demme (39:59):
It's satisfying for me.
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (40:00):
Yeah. At the end of beach episode, we end with questions for reflection. These are questions based on today's show that Beth will read and leave a little pause between for you to answer yourself or you can find a PDF on our buy me a coffee page.
 
Beth Demme (40:14):
Number one, what would you tell your 18-year-old self? Or, if you are 18, what would you tell your future self? Number two, did you have life figured out when you were 18? Number three, has your life turned out like you thought it would when you were 18? What has or hasn't changed? And number four, is there an area of life where your views have changed more than another? Politics, religion or finances?
 
Stephanie Kostopoulos (40:42):
This has been the Discovering Our Scars Podcast. Thanks for joining us.